Meenas Poems

Downsizing my meals
bigger dishware
give way to small.

Two ounces of broth
three spoons of curries
half a bowl of rice,

a glass of buttermilk
with a pinch of salt
comprises my lunch.

My old utensils have
climbed the attic, and will stay
for the rest of life.

The kitchen adopts
a miniature form that reclines 

to an obnoxious  silence.

There is no clattering of vessels,
no more scrubbing of charred  
wares, taps do not sing.

The pantry is bare
bereft of stacks of rice,
pulses and gallons of oil.

Refrigerator breathes easily, 

little dumping,  of stock

a minimal occupation of space.

Tranquility unassumingly takes hold
awe grips, fear and solitude
reign supreme,

The first week of every month
when payments storm in
both output and input
the outflow pulls me beneath

while the inflow overwhelms
like a river which floods during 

monsoonwhich dries during peak summer.

Very much familiar with these nuances
as I come from a business family.

my mom used to tell me  
“no one teaches a fish
how to swim”.  I sigh almost
like a hippopotamus when
I have to substantiate each expense..

Earlier the outward was greater
while the inward was minimal
a semblance to the dried up
wells, wherein water seeps nebulously I

 minimize the purchase,skip 

the most required, my mom,again

“buy a fitting shoe, never 

opt for a bigger one”

As I grew in years I learnt
the art of balancing.
debit the giver, credit the receiver,
the only principleI remember till date
I pursue the ledgers, journals,
daybook, cash books, bank books
with the ease of reading fiction.

The blood that runs in my veins
neither allows me to reach
the realms of fantasy, nor permit
to seek the divine, The ethereal
turns elusive, the mundane
co exists.  I continue to wear
the business garb, no matter
how awkward I look.

It is the looking forward
that keeps me going.

The anxiety of tomorrow
drives me with a push.

I wake up with a renewed energy
ready to face the day.

The day dawns as expected
the events move in a zig zag.

I negotiate like a trained driver
 clearing one by one,

 I slow down, overtake, go behind
cross and follow with patience.

Incredible it appears seeing my own self
tolerant and pragmatic.

I am close to the destination
which looks like a paradise.

One more step to go
to merge with eternity.

 Nearing, almost there,
Oh! I will be seen no more.

–.

She is a mother
neither in flesh
nor in blood.

She mothers
neither you, nor me
but the entire

She stays calm
erupts like a volcano
while in anger,

Fertility abounds
barrenness is

a rarity

Endowed with richness
she copes with all
equips and reequips.

She remains stoi
withstands sun
and rain.

She stays forever
not the one who
comes and goes,

Known as Earth
she provides berths
embraces all with mirth.

Seed grows into a sapling
grows rapidly into a tree
leaves sprout, form clusters
 the tree toughens, trunk
 turns thick, assumes
a darkish brown hue
branches spread
far and wide, a shady balm
enfolds.

Tree is majestic and magnificent  
reigns supreme, looks gorgeous
beneath the blue sky. Portraying
 a picturesque combination
of blue and green, Espying, I find
most eyes enlarge, eyebrows rise, lips
curve with smile, the heart
beats with a rhythm.

It is ecstasy I experience,
fascinates and exhilarates.
A solace lifts me above
being ethereal and exquisite.
Gazing at her steadfast
I recline, fall on the knees,
fold my hands.  The tree lets
out a murmur, guffaws
as it sways in the wind

Stepping aside, I turn back
detect the many missteps,
trace the numerous   faults,

I have committed all these years. These
leave me in an anguish create a dilemma,
lacing me in an unenviable status

neither thriving nor oppressing
most likely in a sobering place, turning
me placid and passive.

I continue with a detachment,
one of a compulsion to withhold
emotional exuberance.

Passions wane in the course
resignation grows, I  anticipate a close

 the end of the lane lies not too far.

The one beyond comprehension
rather a kind of illusion
demanding a rapt attention
converts to an evolution,

which makes me deliberate
forcing me to unravel the intricate
presents itself at times ornate
implicating a divisive resonate

based on the nuances of infinity
transcends into a divine beauty,
as visualized in the process of creativity
devolving into a generic form of eternity.

 A long-term associat calls
inquires about my welfare.
talks generally, concludes
he dialed me by mistake

Another one messages,
before I could begin reading
deletes them,  I heard 

his answer ” I did it by mistake.”

My gate creaks, a burly man
wishes me, before I could reciprocate
 He cries ” Oh”,is that you?
 I came by mistake.”

Finally, the postman drops a letter
in the box, returns a little later,
pulls it out in a hurry, remarks
* I slipped the envelope by mistake”

The fetters that surround me
 invisible and intangible
have tied me down to a status
 unfulfilling and thankless.

 This might sound ambiguous to most
 that being true on my side
 born in a traditional community
 family strictly orthodox

confines girls to stay at home
 regardless of their qualifications
and brilliance,vouchsafes education   
 as an achievement not to be exposed.

Ironical it sounds, I underwent
such constraints, which placed me
within the four walls, rain or shine
home is where I perform.

The concept gradually percolated
 made me a home bird, I remained
 and remain at home, executing
 the maximal from the minimal.

At the corner of the road
within the premises of a Bank
a tea vendor has her stall.

A makeshift one polycarbonate
sheets as roof, a table with the huge boiler,
and six plastic chairs,

Her hands prepare tea and snacks
while her ears follow closely the gossip
that goes on.

 A kind of search engine
 akin to Google, she is abreast of all
events in the neighbourhood.

She wields an influence like a Councilor
turns furious when miscreants taunt her
 A genial and a firebrand at the same time